Places

People are the places we wanted to go
If I am and remain this stubborn
We will never speak again
Remember that time when you
hung up on me and I called you
back so you could
do it again?
I couldn't get enough of you and your
abuse.
I wish I could have thought of a better
use of my time back then.
Get it off your chest, regress
Quit telling me lies that make me miss
myself and who I was before I let you
win.
If I call you now would you have
anything to say to me that I
haven't heard before?
I could tell you lots of things that
you don't know about me now, but why
should I? You won't remember
or maybe you'll try to forget that
you're not a mistake I want to
make anymore.
I'm sorry there's nothing to save
When there's nothing left to burn you
have to set yourself on fire
The opposite of that is this:
When there is nothing left to save you have to
save yourself
When there is nothing left to fear you have to
fear yourself
When there is nothing left to lose you have to
lose yourself
When there is nothing left to love you have to
love yourself.
Maybe "opposite" is the wrong word. Maybe these
are all ways of setting yourself on fire.
I hope you do because you've got spark
And you can't tell me that I've extinguished it.
I see it still and only you (I) can extinguish
your own (my own) fire.
Let it roar, invert it, toss it, turn it, play with
fire - let it burn you, consume you, turn you into
ashes and dust.
The world is made of ashes and dust that have
fallen into compromising piles, comprising places
rather than people where we wanted to go.
I'm covered in your soot and you're pristine
Clean and white and lazy.
You never handled my soot
Afraid to get your hands dirty?
Come, come now, we know each other
much to well to be flirty
Will I make it to thirty?
Or will I divide and replicate
Share myself with another other
One with fire in his eyes
Which are the windows to the soul
and heart.
When there is nothing left to burn you (I) have
to set your (my) heart and soul on fire
Become the place he wants to go
Make more places together
I never knew this could happen.
Repression begets repression
Depression begets depression
which is freedom, but with restraints
Restraint begets restraint?
Is that what went wrong?
I don't think so because my restraint
begot you freedom.
But maybe because
your restraint begot mine.
Let's never be restrained
Is it too much?
No, never enough
I think I need help because I have
started to get depressed without you.
I have started to doubt that love
is equal - that I love you as much as you love
me and vice versa. Do you love me as much as I love you?
Sometimes.
I watch you sleep sometimes and it
feels like the first time.
Does selfishness beget selfishness?
If I am selfish and decide that I want
to spend my time with you and only
you forever and ever, then will the same
selfishness awaken in you?
If it did, would I continue to want
you as much as I did before?
Do I lust for unattainable things?
I don't dream of wedding bands or rings
but I sometimes think that I'd love
to be bound
by love
Not symbols of love, because a symbol isn't the
real thing. It stands for something else.
That's what it was! I fell in love
with your love symbolism, which
was very convincing.

Mathematics is full of theorems, half-truths and
proofs
like you
In theory you love me as much as I love
you. When a theory is more or less true, it becomes
a proof.
You once wrote me a proof to confirm
your love and it said:
"I must always put U before ME because
I only have to go through the alphabet once
to get U, but I must go around twice to
get ME."
Those lines of the proof were symbols. They spoke
of love unseen before or since and I don't
want to wait anymore.
Don't wait around for me forever because
I'm not coming back.
Your bags were always packed so why
don't you leave?
It makes me sad to know that in the
beginning, when we were supposed to be
in love - I certainly thought I was -
that you couldn't wait to leave town
or for me to leave town.
How do I know this? Because I look forward
to your absences.
I subtract you from my life
I am calculating and strong
I am not zero now that you are gone or
leaving.
Best begets best
We are at our best without each other
Am I at my best alone or will
another other make me better?
Our dreams diverge
If I don't want two of everything - dogs, kids, cars
am I un-American?
Do dreams exist outside the lines of the mainland
on the map?
But I do dream in twos
There are two of me
And two of you
And we are each a little bit duplicitous.
But I love you both, even your duplicitous bits
All I want to know is, are you being duplicitous
with me? If so,
which me are you being duplicitous
with?
I am awake for the first time. 5:57:30.
No, I was lying before. Now I am genuinely
awake for the first time today. 5:58:10.
I am awake as long as I am looking at
you, but if I blink I forget
No, I was lying before. I am dreaming when I
am looking at you - I don't want to wake up -
and if I blink I'll wake up. Perhaps for the
first time in days.
You're the places I want to go
in my dreams and in reality.